Spiders

Yesterday I was tired in everyway possible. My mind was tire, my body was tired, my hands were tire, my feet were tired, my patience was tired, my kindness was tired, and most tragically my love was tired. But of course it's me so no one can even tell. I always appear in tack to the public world, but I need a reboot soon or I'm going to fall apart in front of everyone. I'm struggling the most with caring about/loving other people. I'm to the point where I want to shout "WHAT ABOUT ME". Of course I know that sounds ridiculous since the world doesn't revolve around me. So I wasn't very thrilled on the inside about the events that happened yesterday: getting repeatedly attacked by spiders!! (Of course this is metaphorical)

spider #1: A repulsive tarantula

So I was just innocently finishing some Christmas shopping when it crawled towards me admiring my beauty. Stupid insect, didn't it know that I didn't want to be bothered. But, no it insist on getting in my way and staying there for I while. I politely sent it off and let out my fustration under a nearby tree. There is nothing worse than unwanted company, and I know that I'm tired when I'm rude enough to voice that opinion. I didn't even stop to get an understanding of the creature; didn't extend a kind hand or say a little prayer for it. Nope my poor little heart and its love are too tired for you to even matter to me, but deep down somewhere I would have love to have viewed You through God's eyes in a loving manner. It is a shame. My love for people should be consistant not waivering. God's love for me doesn't waiver, and I'm suppose to portray his love to others--you know that whole shine a light thing, but I must admit today I was being the perfect pretender because how I felt inside didn't match my actions. Needless to say there was another unfortunate spider that had to encounter and annoy me yesterday.

spider #2: A loopy daddy-long leg

I was getting some homework done when this one galloped across the table. All I have to say about that is that sometimes you run across things that don't behave like they are expected to behave! Yesterday I just felt like stepping on anything that looked like it could bite me, but I must thank God and self-control for keeping me from acting out this aggression. These bugs did no real harm to me, so I should have felt more tolerant towards them.